Remember Marriage Good Times

Every Wednesday I will post a practical wisdom thought or suggestion on marriage, parenting, or life. It is far too easy to remember the not so good moments in a marriage.  Hence, remembering positive moments or situations from the past is always important.  One way to keep a marriage growing, healthy, and strong is to focus on all the good times that have occurred in your marriage.

Every marriage will have challenging “seasons” where stress is present and an emotional separation creates an empty relationship feeling.  By remembering and discussing those fun, happy times from the past, your marriage can receive a boost of encouragement for an even better and happier future.

TODAY:  Or sometime during this week, individually make a list of the ten best moments in your marriage that does not include family or friends.  Then, exchange lists, sit down together, look into each other’s eyes, and enjoy discussing happy moments in your relationship. 

 Please be sure to “Like” and “Share” when you visit my professional Facebook page so others may receive the post.  If you enjoyed reading this post you may enjoy reading other posts found on the website, www.DrRandallSchroeder.com, under either “Categories” or “Archives.”  Thank you!

Leadership Parenting Seminar

On Monday, September 12 from 7:00 to 8:00 pm at Cornerstone Lutheran Church, I will give a Parenting Presentation to help parents expand  their skill set of "tools," provide ideas to positively enhance a parent-child relationship, and enable parents to lead their child to make healthy decisions. Practical insights and specific techniques will be given to help parents become even more confident.  Enjoy discovering effective ways to guide a child in developing responsible behavior.  

LOCATION

Cornerstone Lutheran Church

4850 East Main Street

Carmel, IN 46033

317-814-4252

Influence Your Child's Heart

Every Wednesday I will post a practical wisdom thought or suggestion on marriage, parenting, or life.  The Bible states that words and actions come from the heart (Proverbs 4:23, Matthew 15:18).  So as a parent, one of your major goals is to influence your child’s heart leading to responsible decision-making.  Sadly, I estimate that 90% of parents, even the most loving ones, often hold the false belief that a significant objective is to control a child’s behavior, imposing many unnecessary rules. Some negatives associated with attempting to control a child’s behaviors are constant tension within the home and rebellion, poor decision-making, fears, anxiety, depression, and eating disorders in the child.

A healthy parent wants to be a leader, not a boss. A boss parent creates an atmosphere of rules and regulations over nearly everything.  A leadership parent supervises and provides continual growth opportunities so a child develops good decision-making skills in the home.

Now or in the future, your child will have to make choices with cigarettes, alcohol, illegal drugs, and sexual contact.  Your Godly influence and leadership parenting will influence your child’s heart for a positive outcome in most situations.

Thus, your number one goal is to daily work hard at strengthening your parent-child relationship in order to influence your child’s heart.  Through a nurturing, encouraging relationship and loving guidelines, you can help create a healthy, responsible decision-making child.

TODAY:  In order to influence your child’s heart, what words or actions will help you build a stronger bond with your child in order to lead them toward becoming a wonderful decision-maker?

 Please be sure to “Like” and “Share” when you visit my professional Facebook page so others may receive the post.  If you enjoyed reading this post you may enjoy reading other posts found on the website, www.DrRandallSchroeder.com, under either “Categories” or “Archives.”  Thank you!

Leadership Parenting Seminar

On Monday, September 12 from 7:00 to 8:00 pm at Cornerstone Lutheran Church, I will give a Parenting Presentation to help parents expand  their skill set of "tools," provide ideas to positively enhance a parent-child relationship, and enable parents to lead their child to make healthy decisions. Practical insights and specific techniques will be given to help parents become even more confident.  Enjoy discovering effective ways to guide a child in developing responsible behavior. LOCATION

Cornerstone Lutheran Church

4850 East Main Street

Carmel, IN 46033

317-814-4252

Make Sleep A Priority

Every Wednesday I will post a practical wisdom thought or suggestion on marriage, parenting, or life. Never underestimate the importance of sleep for a happy, successful life.  Hence, an extremely important objective for all of us is to make sleep a priority!  Lack of sleep and /or irregular sleep hours will confuse our biological clock often resulting in negative effects mentally, emotionally, and in relationships.

Children who do not achieve the required amount of sleep for their age level frequently suffer academically and are more irritable at home and school.  Adults who do not have the minimal amount of sleep usually have poorer work performance and often experience relationship struggles.  Lack of sleep can also lead to a weakened immune system, anxiety, depression, heart complications, impaired judgment, and memory issues as well as other serious problems.

Have two goals: 1) a regular sleep schedule and 2) a regular bedtime routine.  With your sleep schedule, consistently go to bed at approximately the same time.  Adults should aim for a minimum of seven hours of sleep, while school-aged children require a minimum of eight and a half to eleven hours of sleep.  Prepare for sleep by developing a regular bedtime routine.  Avoid stimulants within six hours of bedtime; clear your mind for sleep by planning for the next day with a “things to do list”; and finally relax one hour before bedtime.

TODAY:  Improve your energy, focus, and mood by writing down your Sleep Schedule and the various components for your Bedtime Routine. 

Please be sure to “Like” and “Share” when you visit my professional Facebook page so others may receive the post.  If you enjoyed reading this post you may enjoy reading other posts found on the website, www.DrRandallSchroeder.com, under either “Categories” or “Archives.”  Thank you!

The "3Ts" of Marriage: Time, Talking, and Touching

Every Wednesday I will post a practical wisdom thought or suggestion on marriage, parenting, or life. The “3Ts” of Marriage:  Time, Talking, and Touching

Very simply, without regular “Time Together,” “Talking Together,” and “Touching Together,” it may be very difficult to enjoy complete marital satisfaction.  One way to enhance a marriage is to focus on consistently incorporating the “3Ts” in a relationship.  All “3Ts” need to be present daily NOT just weekly.  Healthy couples set a goal to make the “3Ts” part of their daily marital routine.

However, due to different work schedules, I realize that all “3Ts” may not be possible for every couple.  Nonetheless, every day evaluate:  1) How much Time you spend with your spouse?; 2)  The quantity and quality of your face-to-face Talking; and 3) How many times you physically Touch each other from the time you wake up until the time you go to bed?  I think you will be amazed how a daily assessment will help overcome the “Disease of Complacency.”

TODAY:  Or one day this week, sit “touching” on the sofa and spend “time” “talking” with your spouse about how to integrate the “3Ts” on a daily basis.

Please be sure to “Like” and “Share” when you visit my professional Facebook page so others may receive the post.  If you enjoyed reading this post you may enjoy reading other posts found on the website, www.DrRandallSchroeder.com, under either “Categories” or “Archives.”  Thank you!

Regular Marriage Dates Are Essential

Every Wednesday I will post a practical wisdom thought or suggestion on marriage, parenting, or life. Regular Marriage Dates Are Essential

During the premarital period, most couples enjoyed dates with each other at least once or twice per week.  Those “Special Date Times” were a major factor for enhancing feelings of love, thereby, creating a strong, rewarding relationship and the desire to eventually marry.

Sadly, although a common occurrence before the wedding ceremony, after the second year of marriage most couples stop having regular dates outside the home.  And without consistent bi-monthly dates, it can be very difficult to have a satisfying marriage.

After helping more than a thousand marriages, I have found that couples with gratifying relationships usually have “Special Date Times” at least twice per month.  Those regular dates allow a couple to lovingly look into each other’s eyes with full focused attention resulting in a stronger emotional bond.  To have a happy marriage and stay emotionally connected, set a goal to return to your premarital romance times of frequent dates.

 TODAY:  Whether a date costs nothing or is an expensive one, plan a fun outing together within the next two weeks and continue that significant healthy habit at least twice per month. 

          Please be sure to “Like” and “Share” when you visit my professional Facebook page so others may receive the post.  If you enjoyed reading this post you may enjoy reading other posts found on the website, www.DrRandallSchroeder.com, under either “Categories” or “Archives.”  Thank you!

One Significant Marriage Goal

Every Wednesday I will post a practical wisdom thought or suggestion on marriage, parenting, or life. One significant marriage goal is to overcome complacency!  Complacency can be defined as taking your spouse and/or your marriage for granted.  The disease of complacency is a major reason for a troubled, unhappy relationship, and sadly one frequent cause for divorce.

For most of us, when we were dating our marriage partners, we made frequent uplifting comments and did many kind actions in order to win our future spouse’s heart.  Unfortunately for many relationships, after the second year of marriage such considerate words and behaviors diminish with each passing year.

Ask yourself two key questions:  “When was the last time I either complimented or made a very encouraging comment to my spouse?”  And “When was the last time I demonstrated a nice, thoughtful action toward my spouse?”  One essential way for us to overcome complacency is to continue being a boyfriend or girlfriend to our spouses.  Such an attitude will cause us to work really hard at valuing our partners.

TODAY:  And every day, be like a boyfriend/girlfriend to your spouse by making caring comments as well as exhibiting meaningful actions.  

Please be sure to “Like” and “Share” when you visit my professional Facebook page so others may receive the post.  If you enjoyed reading this post you may enjoy reading other posts found on the website, www.DrRandallSchroeder.com, under either “Categories” or “Archives.”  Thank you!

Only Positive Labels For A Child

Every Wednesday I will post a practical wisdom thought or suggestion on marriage, parenting, or life. An absolutely essential goal for every parent or adult is to "Positive Label" a child.  And the second significant goal is to NEVER, NEVER, NEVER share a negative label with a child. A child will usually fulfill the positive or negative label that is given and sadly become that “label” as an adult.  Hence, when a child is told, "You are shy," often the child will be shy rather than outgoing and confident.  When a child is told, "You are lazy," the child will usually be lazy rather than hard-working.

Always remember when giving a child a positive label to be sincere.  One way to strengthen and build healthy attributes within a child is to identify one or two weaknesses like "shy" and "lazy."  Then, find the positive and catch the child “confidently speaking to someone” or giving a “really good effort” and say, "I appreciate that you were being outgoing" or "I appreciate that you are a hard worker."

Bottom line, whatever label or reputation a child is given, in all likelihood that is what the child will become as an adult.  Let’s make all our labels for children positive!

TODAY:  Build a child's self-worth and share one or two positive labels with an "I appreciate . . .”

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Marriage Expectations

In the middle of each week, I will post a practical wisdom thought or suggestion on marriage, parenting, or life. Your spouse cannot read your mind!  Yet, when you feel disappointed in your marriage, the reason is often due to a “mind-reading” expectation.  At times, we all can have the “false belief” that our spouse should meet our expectation without us even making our request known, and that harms our relationship.

Remember to always question yourself when you are disappointed in your spouse, “Did I make my expectation known?”  You and I will frequently find that our hurt is due to our own mistake of not requesting our expectation.  In addition, most often it is healthiest to ASK for your expectation rather than even use a polite statement to prevent your spouse from feeling a demand by you.

TODAY:  Identify one expectation you have for your spouse and enhance your relationship by ASKING your spouse for that expectation. 

When you visit my professional Facebook page please be sure to “Like” and “Share” so others may receive the post.  If you enjoyed reading this post you may enjoy reading other archived posts found on the website, www.DrRandallSchroeder.com.  Thank you!